So the Perfects are really starting to take shape! We’ve worked out some of the details, and changed my superhero name to the awesome Captain Emo. All we need now is names for Ve-Ve and Steph and then we can really get to work (they didn’t like Redneck Ronnie and Asian Girl). I almost think this post should be under the comics section, but I’ll refrain from that until we’ve actually started drawing the characters.

As you all know, the Perfects are native to The Wood and therefore have their headquarters, the Perfect Mansion in the center of town. That’s right, the ten acre mansion on Sunset is the new home of the Perfects. I always said I was going to buy that house one day, just to show how powerful I was. Now it’s not just my dream, but every one of the Perfects. Of course, the current house just won’t do. It must be much bigger and more amazing. We plan on buying the property surrounding the Perfect Mansion (all the way out to the Junior High) in order to accommodate our various training and leisure facilities. We’ll also have to build up the property so we can have at least two basement floors. Hopefully we’ll come up with more of the design soon, but I assure you it will be fucking perfect.

In other news, I’d like to say that I loved all of the rankings yesterday. I especially liked Leahanne’s rankings. It’s like she catered it to me. Pool playing skills, blonde hair and blue eyed-ness, nerdiness. Come on, Leahanne, give everyone else a shot. I also enjoyed Brandon’s and his quest to scientifically prove what everyone knows: Kistenmacher is a nerd. I look forward to ranking everything in my life, with Katie getting the short end of the stick every time. That’s what you get for ranking your friends itch! It’s ok, though, because you’re so perfect.

I managed to be really productive today, working for about three hours straight on all my immediate homework. I still have tons that I should be doing, but I got a lot done that I didn’t think I’d be able to in one day. I even took a ten minute break to start sketching Captain Emo. I know, it’s nerdy. For proof of my nerdiness just look at Brandon’s website. Anyway, I came up with part of the costume and decided that my hair will always be covering my face. Not only is it emo as hell, but it saves me from having to draw eyes and a nose (unless I’m being held prisoner or something forces me to pin my hair back).

I also downloaded even more ringers for my cell phone yesterday. Brandon is now Tiny Dancer, Leahanne is Anna Begins and Katie is I Don’t Wanna Be. Everyone else is the same. Oh, and Brandon’s image is now the cast of Dawson’s Creek. Be jealous! If anyone wants a specific ringer, just message me and consider it done…unless I don’t like it. Then go screw yourself. Ok, well I’m hungry so I’m gonna go eat and then see what happened to Gugglie’s room (he called me earlier). Before I leave I just wanted to let all of the Perfects know that you’re so fucking perfect!

It’s been far too long since I actually ranted about something so I thought it would be fun to procrastinate and do just that. I spend a substantial part of my day online, as most of you do as well. While most of that time is spent reading reviews of movies or researching random bits of pop culture, I do occasionally chat on AIM or MSN. I’ve always found chatting, much like text messaging to be weird. I like to talk on the phone or in person whenever possible but I understand the convenience with using these programs; you don’t have to concentrate as hard and can do two things at once. It still amazes me how the internet, possibly the greatest creation of our generation, has actually made people dumber. How so, you ask? Just look at how people talk online…they use these ridiculous acronyms and shorten words that don’t need to be shortened. You is a three letter word! Why must you shorten it to “u”? My biggest pet peeve, however, and one that I’ve seen increase recently is the use of “there” when the person means “their” or they’re”. Come on, people we learned that one back in fourth grade. I think I’ve misused “there” once or twice when chatting online and I always recognize and acknowledge the mistake soon after. If you’re trying to argue in favor of a position or make a dramatic statement it is especially important to use the correct form. If you don’t it ruins the flow of the text and makes you look like a five year old retarded boy. That’s right, the written word is capable of such imagery. So next time double check what you write or else there all going to think their better than you because you sound like an idiot.

Oh, and don’t even get me started on people who still spell it “thier”. That makes you look like a drunken buffoon.

Well hello there. First I’d like to say how happy I am that Brandon and Leahanne are updating their websites regularly. Also, I loved Brandon’s post from a few days ago…I’m glad you’re confident enough to admit that you suck.

So last night I watched a movie for the first time since I got back to Austin. (I watched Gangs of New York but that was for a project) I saw Sky Captain, which I had been really excited about…unfortunately, I was very disappointed. Visually, it looked pretty great. Some scenes (especially NY) were amazing and the style was perfect. There wasn’t much else, though. The acting wasn’t awful, but I expected MUCH more from these actors. I don’t blame them though, I blame the direction. This movie’s direction was terrible. Gwyneth Paltrow looked retarded as she ran from the robots in one of the opening scenes, the blocking always looked awkward and the actors looked like they were acting on a green screen. Now I know this isn’t green screen’s fault, because Lucas makes it work with his actors and Rodriguez is gonna make it the most kick ass way to make movies with Sin City. It was all the director. This movie would’ve been absolutely amazing if Spielberg had decided to do it. His screenwriting team would’ve removed the crap that was most of the story and focused honoring the genre. Personally, I wish the entire movie had been about robots attacking New York. It’s such a perfect setting for that genre! Instead, only the first fifteen minutes take place there. That’s when the movie starts to suck. Brandon’s in love with it, but I was just too disappointed to give it my recommendation.

In other news, I would like to introduce the world to the new team of superheroes. We all know that New York has far too many heroes already and that’s why our group has decided to be stationed in The Wood. Together we fight to continue television melodrama, create an amazing show about our lives and figure out what the *&$! is going on in Lost. We are the few, the emo, the proud, THE PERFECTS. I was talking to one of my UT friends at lunch, explaining my powers as the Human Tear and she asked what our group was called. At first I said “Ryan Ward is my God”, but then decided that too many people would want to join that group. Instead, I based the name on my own pseudonym, Mr. Perfect, given to me by countless women across the globe. The group consists of Skittles Boy (Formerly Linguistics Boy), The Human Tear (“Tear On!”), Sperm Girl, The Lucky Charm, Diet Coke Queen and Summer from the O.C. (yes, the real one). Together the Perfects protect the Wood from the evil forces that plague our wholesome Quaker town. No, I’m not talking about the gays or the “coloreds”. I’m talking about the crazy ass Quakers themselves. And Mormans, too. Let’s throw in Pearland and Alvin for kicks. They also protect the stars of the WB’s hit drama coming summer of 2020, The Wood. Most importantly, however, they fight to destroy the Sisterhood of Evil Sluts, founded by Sarah and her minions. Keep an eye out for the Perfects around Friendswood and look for their new comics, written by the Pulitzer prize winning duo of Brandon Nowalk and Ryan Ward. Those kids kick ass! Their run on the Perfects is gonna be Fucking Perfect!

I found the apartment that I’m probably going to live in next year. It’s kinda far away, but it will force me to stay at school all day without distractions. That should allow me to get my work done before I get home. The apartment is pretty nice; I’ll have my own room and we have a washer/dryer. I’ll also be able to play tennis more often. I’m pretty excited, it should be fun.

I keep forgetting that it’s 2005. It’s almost been a month and I still write 2004 on everything. I really like the year 2004. It has nothing to do with graduation or turning 18, I just really like years that end in even numbers. It’s even better when the entire year is composed of even numbers. And 4 is better than 6, everyone knows this. Yup, 2004 was a good year.

So it has taken the better part of seven years, but my emoness is officially rubbing off on people. The other day Leahanne completed the Triumverate of Emo with her first emo post. (We all of course remember discovering Brandon’s “secret, personal” emo post over Christmas break). Anyway, I’m glad that other people have continued the tradition…maybe I can write some happy posts now.

On a random note, Brandon enjoys writing way too much. I simply don’t have the patience to write as much as he does. Someone please talk to him. And let me say what no one else will, his looks have become a problem.

I’m just gonna keep writing a few sentences on random subjects that no one cares about because I can. It’s my website damnit, I can do whatever I want. I think everyone who reads this is stupid and ugly. What’re you gonna do about that? Nothing, fugly! That’s what I thought. Back to my point…I don’t really have one. Have I mentioned that my phone is waterproof? It’s really amazing.

Instead of wasting time updating my comics section, I’m only gonna talk about comic related issues in this one paragraph…skip it if you’re bored by that sort of thing. Anyway, I’ve decided that I am a mutant…I just haven’t figured out my special power yet. One day, it will come. Extreme emoness? They can call me the Human Tear. Or maybe Pansy Man. I’ll work on it. Also, I wonder if Pixar had to pay royalties to Marvel. When you think about it, they really ripped off some of the characters. The mom is essentially Mr. Fantastic, the son is Quicksilver, the daughter is Invisible Woman and Mr. Incredible’s best friend is just like Ice Man. I love the movie but the characters seem like modified versions of these classic characters. Just a thought…

So my Irish-American lit teacher is Satan. She assigned a 120 page reading of the history of Irish immigration during the Potato Famine for the second day of class. I signed up to take a class on literature, not history! Plus, we have group presentations that start this week (mine’s next week) that count for 15% of our grade. When does she expect us to do everything she asks in addition to work in our other classes? Crazy bitch.

I think I’m gonna try to go without writing an emo post for a month. I know it sounds crazy but it’s a resolution of mine. Plus, everyone knows that resolutions don’t mean a thing. If anything, I think New Year’s Resolution should be redefined to mean “shit you’re not gonna do this year”. Here are some more “resolutions”:

Don’t make New Year’s Resolutions at the end of January.

Write “The Wood” on every bill of currency that comes into my possession with the hope that in the future one of those bills will find it’s way back to me.

Plant a bunch of trees so that I can show them to my kids when I get older. Then cut the trees down and make pamphlets on the dangers of deforestation.

Start buying Cadbury eggs so that the feds won’t be able to trace the purchases when I begin to use them…

Write Anna Nicole Smith and let her know that, “yes, I do want your body, along with a case of Trimspa.” Damn!

Call TBS and let them know just how funny they are.

Ehh, what the hell. World peace. Sure, that sounds good.

Wow, I’ve managed to write a bunch of useless crap. I hope that this was even more meaningless than Brandon’s post. I can almost guarantee I won’t write this much again for a while…I’m just too lazy.

You’ve been warned. It has officially been one year since I moved back to Texas and I’m still as indecisive about the decision I made last January. I honestly don’t know if it was the right thing to do. Sure, I had loads of fun in Texas and I’m glad I got to spend all that time with everyone. One Act was also a lot of fun and something I’ll never forget. Still, I left my “Belgian” life cold turkey. My four years in Belgium were the most critical and important of my life. They made me who I am today. Along with that are the friends that influenced my life immeasurably…I can’t help but feeling like I abandoned them in a sense. We were all so close and I haven’t been great at keeping in touch. I definitely dealt with leaving through denial. After my friends through an amazing “going away” party, I felt miserable. The truth is that I’m just incredibly fortunate; I have two amazing groups of friends that are always there when I need them. Anyway, after that party I didn’t want to leave. I wrote my most emo post ever on this website that I’m pretty sure none of my friends ever saw. For weeks I didn’t think I was doing the right thing and eventually I just became too busy to think about it.

I guess I just didn’t appreciate Belgium enough when I was there. I loved my school and friends but didn’t like the hassles of living in a French-speaking country and felt like I was a burden on the Beardsleys. Now I realize that those last six months were pretty precious. My friends are from all over the world and we’ll never all be living in the same city ever again. With my “Texas friends” (most of the people reading this) its not the same. We see each other all the time because our families all still live here. Had I not moved back, our friendships would likely be just as strong and we’d still have all the holidays and summers to hang out. I missed the last chance to enjoy adolescence with my Belgian friends. I guess I’m trying to apologize in a sense to all of my friends in Belgium. I haven’t been the best friend in the past year and I miss you all more than you’ll ever know. I have pictures of you all over my dorm room and I can’t wait to visit you all. (My mom has promised me that it will actually happen!!)

Aside from feeling really down today, my classes have been going well this week. I’m pretty tired from all the work but the O.C. comes on tonight, so everything will be better. I’ve started studying in between classes and that’s allowed me to get much more work done and drain my iPod battery daily. That’s all for now…sorry I couldn’t find a picture with all of the nonagon so I had to use the one above.

So I’m back in Austin and having a great time. I was beginning to have DC++ withdrawal but managed to get a quick fix before it got really bad. I even found some people who have comics which is awesome….I’ve been reading comics almost constantly since. Look for a big update in the comics section soon…I know, you’re all so excited about that. In other news, my phone is waterproof. I accidentally left it in my pants yesterday (which had to be washed because I spilled lemonade on them) and it worked after being washed. That’s one badass phone. Anyway, if you’re back in Austin give me a call and we’ll hang out. Now I’ll go back to reading my comic…

My teeth hurt. That was pretty much the only thing true about the last post. Oh, I did get Tivo, also. Everything else was my “salute to drama”. You see, I don’t have enough drama in my life so I enjoy creating it. I thought it would be fun to write sometime really ambiguous and see if it got people talking. I win. Anyway, enough about me and my nerdy fun…go watch the O.C.! Now!

So here’s my first post of the year. My teeth hurt. I feel like shit, and to top it off my friends are being distant. Don’t you just love it when someone who you think you know everything about is keeping a huge secret from you and it seems like everyone else knows it? It’s even worse when that secret is that they don’t really like you all that much and think you’re kinda a bastard. Yeah, it feels great. At least my sister still loves me. I think. After everything that’s happened in the last few days I almost want to stay home and not hang out with people. I’m tired of being fake and pretending like I don’t know things that people are too retarded to actually tell me to my face. Words of advice: be honest. I fucking hate when people are fake. It accomplishes nothing…it just makes the inevitable that much worse. Things would be so much better if we were all upfront with people. Anyway, I know I’ll forgive all of these people eventually I’m just going through one of my emo moods. Why must I hate myself so much? I’ll never know…

On a brighter note, I got Tivo today! Yeah! Now I can stay at home with my phone on silent and watch hours upon hours of good television. Seinfeld will definitely be part of the mix. Take care everyone, and give me a call if you feel like being real for once.